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FunTranscript
00:05So I'll just need 30 seconds to perform this. It's basically an activity where the brain sends signals to the
00:13other one, and it becomes a clash.
00:16You try to do something from one hand, from the other hand, but together when you do it, not everyone
00:24is able to do it.
00:25You all can try it, if you think you can do it. One hand in clockwise motion, another hand in
00:31anti-clockwise motion.
00:33So you need to do this too.
00:43So my brain is bad, what you're saying. My brain is bad, what you're saying.
00:47It's like all signals.
00:49So yeah, this is my only talent.
00:51Okay, that's what I have to do.
00:53Fuck, man.
00:56How are you doing this?
00:57This is the form you've made.
00:59You've released a link, you've done so much.
01:02And I'll do this for you.
01:04Oh!
01:05Oh!
01:11Our brain is bad.
01:15So, Koshika Ji.
01:17Yes.
01:19I'll try it.
01:20Samai, if you can try it.
01:22What?
01:22Try it.
01:23Samai, can you please come in the center of the stage?
01:26Let's have Samai in the center of the stage.
01:28And can you show him properly?
01:30Yeah.
01:31One hand in clockwise motion.
01:32Okay.
01:33Another hand in anti-clockwise motion.
01:36And you have to do this together.
01:38Oh!
01:39Switch, switch, switch.
01:42Switch, switch.
01:42Switch, switch.
01:45But it's like this.
01:49So what's your work in life?
01:52I'll be able to make a virus.
01:55Virus?
01:56What?
01:57What can you do?
01:57Oh!
01:58It's a virus.
02:00And maybe I'll be able to make a Lana Roads.
02:12So, Koshika Ji, what do you do apart from this shit?
02:16I run an agency.
02:18You run an agency?
02:19Yes.
02:19You're the owner of the agency?
02:20Yes.
02:21Wow.
02:22I love you so much.
02:22I can't tell you.
02:23When you come on stage,
02:25I feel like you've got a problem.
02:28You need brand work.
02:29I feel like you've got a problem.
02:31I feel like you've got a problem.
02:33Plus GST.
02:37With 2% reduction.
02:40But you'll get extra usage.
02:42Okay.
02:43I have been learning to drive scooty for 8 years now,
02:46but I still can't drive.
02:48That's like me and comedy, babe.
02:50We're the same.
02:51Yeah, that's what I do.
02:53I don't want to do this.
02:55I don't know.
02:57I don't know.
03:01I don't know.
03:05I don't know.
03:21So make some noise for Kaushik Paniya Ji.
03:24Kaushika.
03:24Kaushika Paniya Ji.
03:25Thank you so much for joining.
03:27So time to score her, man.
03:29So you've done...
03:30I don't know what to do,
03:33how much to score you.
03:34So I'm on the edge.
03:35I've given you 5.
03:36I'll give you 6.5 and I'm taking 1.5 back.
03:41So 5.5.
03:425.5.
03:43If you're taking 1.5 back,
03:44then how much is it?
03:49Okay.
03:546.
03:546.
03:54And the secret to making money, Kaushika,
03:56is to inherit it.
03:58Oh.
04:015.
04:015.
04:02They've given me 5.
04:03And...
04:042.
04:042.
04:05So using both her hands.
04:07You can write this video in the comments.
04:10So your average is 4.5.
04:13I've given you 5.
04:13I've given you 5.
04:198.5.
04:20Oh no.
04:22Thank you so much for joining Kaushika Paniya Ji.
04:25Take care.
04:28People don't have 8.5 today.
04:30They're very confident in me.
04:31Why?
04:32Firstly, I'm not from China.
04:35I'm from Thailand.
04:37I'm from Thailand.
04:38No.
04:39Just kidding.
04:40Just kidding.
04:40And I'm from Natural.
04:41North East.
04:43The ones who forgot the CBSE people.
04:45Oh.
04:47Oh.
04:48Recently, I went to Rajasthan.
04:52They sent me to the foreigners' line.
04:56What?
04:57It's closed.
04:58Oh.
05:00Sorry.
05:01From China.
05:05You can start the premise again.
05:07Recently.
05:08Recently.
05:09Recently, I went to Rajasthan.
05:11I went to Rajasthan.
05:11They sent me to the foreigners' line.
05:14They sent me to the foreigners' line.
05:15I had to buy a ticket for Rs. 25.
05:15I had to buy a ticket for Rs. 800.
05:17I had to buy a ticket for Rs. 800.
05:20What?
05:21What?
05:24What?
05:26What?
05:32What?
05:33What?
05:35What?
05:38What?
05:38What's that guys?
05:39One day!
05:43You have performed like a first-timer is performing.
05:46You have performed very well as a first-timer. Very nice.
05:50When are you doing this?
05:51Today.
05:54It's your first time?
05:55Yes, I have the first time in stage.
05:57So I was...
05:58I can't forget it.
06:01Chelsea, I want to give you your advice.
06:04You are very cute.
06:06You are so natural.
06:08You don't feel like you are doing the first time.
06:11Because you are enjoying yourself.
06:12Yes.
06:13I mean, you have nervousness in your chest.
06:15But the smile at the end was quite good.
06:17We were crying.
06:19Copping.
06:20I don't get a laugh.
06:23Have you ever eaten a dog?
06:25No, I have a pet.
06:27But it's like a word.
06:28Because my friends eat it.
06:30Okay, so you don't call them at home?
06:32Yes.
06:33They eat a pet dog sometimes.
06:35What?
06:38I think you are saying that.
06:40No, I don't say that.
06:41Oh, that's the dog style.
06:51You have written that I have three grandmothers.
06:54Yes.
06:55Which side?
06:56Dadi or Nani?
06:57Nani.
06:57Nana.
06:58Nana.
06:58You have three grandmothers?
07:00Yes.
07:01We were there.
07:02You said Nana was a player.
07:05They were.
07:06They were also a pet dog?
07:07No, no.
07:10Okay.
07:11No, no.
07:11I didn't start with her number 9-8.
07:15So, you are who is Nani's daughter?
07:18Nani's daughter?
07:19Doty.
07:20Doty.
07:21I don't know Hindi.
07:22Okay.
07:23Dadi's daughter's daughter's daughter's daughter's daughter.
07:24Oh, that's how it is.
07:26He didn't say that.
07:26That's how it is.
07:27So, why are you your daughter's daughter?
07:28I'm a daughter.
07:32They're old.
07:33They're old.
07:34They're old.
07:35They're old.
07:37They respect Nani's daughter's daughter.
07:41So, how many brothers and sisters have your mother's daughter?
07:43My mother's daughter?
07:45I'll be 14.
07:47They're 14?
07:49You're 14 brothers?
07:51No, no.
07:52My mother's daughter's daughter's daughter.
07:54We're only four brothers.
07:56I have two daughters.
07:57My mother's daughter's daughter?
07:58One minute.
08:00Nana.
08:00I'm going to be again in the show.
08:02Nana's daughter?
08:03Yes.
08:04All of these people...
08:04Have you ever had such conversations?
08:06Jesse, how many are you?
08:07I'm, why?
08:08Jesse, Jesse.
08:09No one.
08:11How do you keep this name?
08:12Just, see, Jesse.
08:14Wait, wait.
08:14I got this topic.
08:15One second.
08:16There are two mothers.
08:16There are two mothers.
08:1912 daughters.
08:20How do you keep this name?
08:26So...
08:26So, who's your mother's daughter?
08:28Second, first, third?
08:29First.
08:30First.
08:30I'm going to be family tree.
08:33Family forest, bhai.
08:35One, two, three daughters.
08:36First daughters and two daughters.
08:38First daughters and two daughters.
08:40Yes.
08:40I mean, my father's two wives.
08:43I'm saying that.
08:44Sorry.
08:44My father's two wives.
08:46Have you ever been to the boss?
08:48Have you ever been to the boss?
08:57How do you speak to the boss?
09:00How do you speak to the boss?
09:03I'm saying that.
09:05I'm saying that.
09:07I'm saying that.
09:08I'm saying that.
09:09I'm saying that.
09:10So, what were you doing with your daughter?
09:12What were you doing?
09:14Of course.
09:15What was the time you had to do with them?
09:19What were you doing with them?
09:21Maybe they were a serpent.
09:23Maybe.
09:25Maybe.
09:26She was born in the whole village and then...
09:28She said, now I'm a serpent.
09:35Logical promotion.
09:37Do you live in Delhi or are you here especially with Arun Aachal?
09:40No, no, no. I live here, Gazi Band.
09:42Okay. Oh!
09:43Oh!
09:45Arun Aachal, Gazi Band.
09:47They come from this direction.
09:51You are a crazy family. Genuinely.
09:54Is this common in your village?
09:56Yes. Now we have changed a little bit.
09:58First, because we...
09:58You have crossed, Nana Ji.
10:01Genghis Khan is not the name of your Nana Ji.
10:08No.
10:10She is telling her.
10:12What did Genghis Khan do?
10:14What did Genghis Khan do?
10:15Genghis Khan was the OG Mahib Singh.
10:19Oh, man.
10:20So, disabled is the right word we can use?
10:23Yes.
10:24Yes.
10:24So...
10:26Especially...
10:26You have understood...
10:28What is the right word?
10:30What is the wrong word?
10:31What is the right word?
10:32He is a very sensitive man.
10:32Some are lihav.
10:34Some are lihav.
10:35Some are lihav.
10:35Some are lihav.
10:36That's something new.
10:37So, when are you learning the kids?
10:40Huh?
10:44Sorry.
10:45Sorry.
10:45What is the right word?
10:47What is the right word?
10:48So...
10:48Why do you teach disabled kids to disabled kids?
10:52I really like kids.
10:55I mean...
10:55I mean...
10:56I mean...
10:56I mean...
10:56Some are lihav.
10:59What's your opinion on that?
11:01Stephen Hawking came...
11:02Abston?
11:03Abston?
11:03Abston Island.
11:05Abston Island.
11:05They like them too.
11:08I don't know about that.
11:09There's nothing on that.
11:10Nothing on that.
11:11There's nothing on that.
11:13There's nothing on that.
11:13But...
11:14Charlie...
11:14I'm gonna really have a photographer.
11:23What are your views on marriage?
11:25Are you already married?
11:26Are you single?
11:27Are you looking for someone in a relationship?
11:29No, I'm in a relationship.
11:30He came with me today.
11:31Oh, he's here.
11:32If you both don't mind, can we bring him?
11:35Yeah, sure.
11:36If you don't mind, Merevai.
11:38Kevin.
11:39Round of applause for Kevin, everyone.
11:40Round of applause for Kevin.
11:43Where are you both?
11:44I don't know.
11:45I met in Gazibad.
11:48Like...
11:49The two were running away from someone.
11:52Do you know in your house?
11:53Yes.
11:53Do you know in your house?
11:55No, I don't know in my house.
11:56Do you know in your house?
11:57But we won't know everyone.
11:59Yes.
12:02We will stay.
12:08Will you go?
12:09Yes, it will.
12:10It's okay.
12:11What will you do?
12:12What will you do, darling?
12:14Oh, my God.
12:15Jesse.
12:18Jesse.
12:19James.
12:21Pokemon?
12:23One, two, two.
12:24One, two, two.
12:25It's our long time to hide.
12:26Don't surrender.
12:27Fight, fight, fight.
12:29You love Pokemon?
12:31No.
12:42So, why are you here, Jesse?
12:44I'm watching people a lot of time.
12:47And I have always, like...
12:49You know...
12:50I'm very fascinated.
12:52And there are a lot of people.
12:54So, I just want...
12:55Where?
12:55I mean, like...
12:56Arnachal, someone...
12:56What are you talking about?
12:58All of them are your own.
13:01What are you talking about?
13:02It's your own.
13:03I mean, Arnachal,
13:04Is there any stand-up that is in the scene?
13:06Stand-up, you're just doing nana.
13:12You're really, really good, man.
13:14Very genuine.
13:14You should keep doing this.
13:15Arnachal, thank you so much for joining us.
13:21Time to score, Jesse Ji.
13:23I have given you...
13:259.
13:269.5 from Akash Gupta.
13:28Mallika Ji.
13:299.5...
13:318.5.
13:328.5.
13:338.5.
13:339.
13:34And 9 from Balraj Bhai.
13:36That makes your average...
13:379.
13:43There, show us too.
13:45GD.
13:46GD.
13:50GD.
13:52Damn, man.
13:52Jesse Ji.
13:53I wish you had won.
13:54But thank you so much for joining, Jesse.
13:55Thank you so much.
13:57Please keep doing open mics.
13:59That's it.
14:03We want you to redeem yourself.
14:05So, do something like that...
14:06All of you are training.
14:08Like, suppose your wife is dead...
14:10And you are going to be consuming...
14:11So, I can do that.
14:12Then, it will happen.
14:13I mean...
14:14Yes, it will happen.
14:15Do you have a wife?
14:15Yes, it is.
14:17Oh, shit.
14:18What's your name?
14:19Divya Andu, brother.
14:20Divya Andu, brother.
14:25So, what has happened to Divya Andu?
14:27I don't know.
14:28My wife is dead.
14:29Yes.
14:30My wife is dead.
14:31It's okay, brother.
14:32No.
14:33It happens.
14:35It happens.
14:36My wife is dead.
14:37It's okay.
14:39My wife is dead.
14:40My wife is dead.
14:40Okay.
14:42I can understand...
14:43Your wife is dead.
14:45No.
14:45I can't buy money in the hospital.
14:47I can't buy money in the hospital.
14:47But it's okay.
14:48She died at home.
14:50Off the script, please.
14:54Off the script.
14:57It's okay, brother.
14:58I can understand your wife.
14:59Why did I die?
15:00Why did I die?
15:15Depreciating acid.
15:16Oh, yeah, yeah.
15:17Nice one, man.
15:17Thank you, man.
15:18Thank you, man.
15:18He's a great guy for your brother.
15:21He's a great guy for Divya Andu, brother.
15:23And his wife too.
15:26It's Jussi.
15:27Jussi.
15:27Jussu Indra Singh wrote it?
15:29Jussi.
15:30Stage name Jussi.
15:31Jussi.
15:31Jussi or Jussi?
15:32Jussi.
15:43Jussi.
15:46Jussi, it continues to be as champion.
15:48Jussi.
15:50That means champion.
15:52Champion.
15:53Champion.
15:57Sorry, BESTDILLmaking references, guys.
16:01So, Jussi, Jussi.
16:13I want to start. Introduction type.
16:16I am a normal person. Don't keep me up.
16:21Wow.
16:22I am a normal person. Don't keep me up.
16:26Don't keep me up.
16:28Don't keep me up.
16:28Don't keep me up.
16:31Are you going to Uber too?
16:33Let's go.
16:42Jesse is there to pick you up.
16:46Jesse has arrived in two minutes.
16:50What was the scene of super power?
16:52Do you like to read the girls or not?
16:56Actually, I mean, I am single.
16:58I don't know who is.
17:01Are you friends or how are you?
17:03So, you wrote so good songs.
17:05Do you ever hear any songs that you like?
17:08I mean, it's right.
17:09I mean, if you listen to this platform, you'll enjoy it.
17:11Or if you have a friend sitting here.
17:13So, you can listen to this song.
17:15No, but you don't listen to this song.
17:17Don't you like to listen to this song?
17:20I like Instagram.
17:24I like Instagram.
17:25I like Instagram.
17:26I like Instagram.
17:26Did you use it on dating app?
17:28Did you use it on dating app?
17:29I used it on dating app.
17:31I was doing it.
17:31But there was no match.
17:32I deleted it for a week.
17:33Then I deleted it.
17:36Which one of you were on dating app?
17:37I?
17:38Tinder.
17:39Tinder?
17:40Sorry.
17:42Which one of you were on?
17:43Tinder.
17:44You were on Tinder.
17:45So, did you have success here?
17:47No.
17:48It's just a week.
17:48It's just a week.
17:51Oh man.
17:52So, what was your job?
17:54My job was in BPO.
17:56Now, I changed the line.
17:57I mean, I'm in social media handling.
17:59Okay.
18:00I'm a social media marketer.
18:01That's right.
18:02Okay.
18:02So, do you own a page or a page?
18:06Yes.
18:06Justy Singh's name.
18:07J.A.S.
18:08Underscore C.
18:09Underscore Singh.
18:10S.I.N.G.S.
18:11This is very important.
18:13I think you have to go to Canada.
18:15You have to go to Canada.
18:16No.
18:18Cancel it.
18:23Trono.
18:24Trono.
18:26Trono.
18:28Trono.
18:29Trono.
18:30Trono.
18:44Trono.
18:45Trono.
18:46Trono.
18:46Trono.
18:48Trono.
18:49Favourite to be as anything.
18:50That's the best.
18:51It's almost there.
18:52But the most are, you.
18:54Ah.
18:55Your manu putni labadar yaar batare
18:59Oh, your cha cha cha cha mukadini
19:05Yo, yo, Janakpuri
19:06Why are you being a conductor in this live man?
19:19If you want to propose with someone from a shairi, then what do you do?
19:25It's written for me.
19:26Yes, yes, yes.
19:27I'll listen to you.
19:28If you want to be with someone from a shairi, I know.
19:31What the word is?
19:32If you want to be with someone from a shairi, I know.
19:36I know.
19:36But don't do it.
19:38If you want to be with someone from a shairi, I know.
19:42But don't do it.
19:44The last one was very strong.
19:48Don't do it.
19:49Wow, wow.
19:50Wow.
19:52Wow.
19:52And whoever my Punjabi friends are watching, don't do it.
20:00It's bad for you.
20:01Very good model.
20:02Very good model.
20:04Take a moral lesson from the show.
20:05Say no to drugs.
20:06It's bad for me.
20:10I'll take your hands to take my hands.
20:12And however, when I say that, I copy my actions.
20:15Copy it. Done?
20:17Gurlin, can you join me?
20:19Can we have a round of applause for?
20:23Please be here.
20:25Gurlin.
20:27You can speak in the mic.
20:29Wherever you can speak, the mic will be.
20:30Gurlin, for a while,
20:33will you feel some sensations?
20:38I'm going to take my mind from the gutter.
20:43Please, please, please.
20:45I'm going to take my timer.
20:47I'm going to take my timer, guys.
20:49My content will be reduced, please.
20:51Okay.
20:53So, no, no, of course.
20:59Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
21:01Okay, here, here, here, here.
21:04Okay, close your eyes.
21:07Close your eyes.
21:13Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike.
21:34Do you have any sensation?
21:35Feel it.
21:35So, if you say something,
21:37just keep it in your mind.
21:38Okay?
21:44Do you feel a touch feel somewhere?
21:46Just answer yes or no.
21:48Yes or no?
21:50Yes or no?
21:50Yes or no?
21:51Yes, yes.
21:51Do you feel a touch feel somewhere?
21:55Do you feel a touch feel somewhere?
21:57Oh!
22:00Oh!
22:00Can you show the exact motion
22:02how you feel?
22:03Oh!
22:07Oh!
22:08Okay, okay, okay.
22:08Open your eyes.
22:09Open your eyes.
22:09Gurlin, you know what?
22:10I didn't even touch you.
22:13You know?
22:17Average.
22:18That's...
22:19Average boy from Delhi.
22:23You know why I didn't touch you?
22:27No, no, no.
22:28Actually, I'm not interested in touching you.
22:30Okay.
22:30Thank you so much.
22:35Yes, I am.
22:39Can you please have a round of applause
22:40for Sneha
22:41till she reaches the mic?
22:44Will she be able to reach the mic is the question.
23:06Yes, as long as you are two different people
23:15Yes, as long as you are
23:16Your love, my heart
23:18Your heart
23:19You are one of mine
23:24It's God's love
23:25You are one of mine
23:25You are one of mine
23:28All right! All right Sneha
23:32So you won't do this full-time?
23:39This is only bathroom time.
23:41Only bathroom time, okay.
23:43Samaya ji.
23:44This was the most difficult you laugh, you lose challenge.
23:50He was saying that he is a bathroom singer.
23:53So he will be a little bit of a laugh.
23:56Look, look, except for Yasharaj, we have no talent to judge you.
24:03We don't have talent, but there is a skin.
24:05So, you...
24:09Just tell me, these chakoo brothers came and gave lalach of 10 rupees.
24:18Went with him and...
24:19Happily to get kidnapped.
24:21What is this?
24:22No.
24:23So...
24:24Happily to get kidnapped.
24:26But...
24:26He went with me and said,
24:28I will give you a coffee.
24:29Let's go.
24:29I said, let's go, let's go.
24:31Let's go.
24:32I went.
24:34And...
24:34Did he get kidnapped?
24:36No, no, no.
24:36He took me back to the cycle.
24:38So I was happily going, okay, let's go.
24:41Let's eat chocolate.
24:41So basically,
24:42I met with the bus.
24:43I met with the bus before.
24:52Up next, we have Stuti.
24:54Oh, my God.
24:56You're kidding.
24:56No, no, no.
24:57What did you bring in your hand?
25:05How did you feel this performance?
25:07Very, very, very, very good.
25:09Very, very, very good.
25:10Very, very, very good.
25:10Very, very good.
25:18Very, very, very good.
25:20Very, very good.
25:20Is this from Uber?
25:28I gave a hug.
25:29I gave a hug.
25:30I gave these numbers to me.
25:31What happened here?
25:33It's 208 average.
25:36You're an engineer.
25:37You're wrong with the calculator.
25:38You're wrong.
25:39You're right.
25:43Man, how difficult it is to talk with comedians.
25:49It's a lot of nervousness.
25:51Don't do it.
25:51Okay.
25:53Okay.
26:03Did you do this in the audition or do that?
26:08It wasn't done.
26:08It wasn't done there.
26:09It wasn't done there.
26:09It was also in the audition.
26:10Yeah, it was in the audition too.
26:17I'm looking at everything good.
26:22It's happening in the truth.
26:23It's happening in the truth.
26:24Don't do it.
26:24Don't do it.
26:24Don't do it.
26:25Don't do it.
26:26Don't do it.
26:31One second.
26:32If you think that after marriage
26:33you will be in control,
26:35what do you want to explore now?
26:38I think I don't think so.
26:40I've just said that.
26:41After marriage you will be locked.
26:43You have to do popping now.
26:45Don't do it.
26:50Don't do it.
26:51Don't do it.
26:52Don't do it.
26:54Don't do it.
27:32Thank you so much for watching.
27:33And take care.
27:38Thank you for the love.
27:39And do find your latent.
27:40You have to do it.
27:41to her.
27:41Yo.
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